The Hidden Battlefield of Family Business

Let’s open the door to a family business. From the outside, it’s a well-oiled machine. Everyone’s smiling, decisions seem to flow effortlessly, and the family stands united.

But step behind the scenes, and it’s a different story.

It’s not a machine at all. It’s a battlefield.

A family business is like a ticking clock. It only works because every cog turns in sync. But here’s the kicker: the cogs are people. And people aren’t predictable.

Now, let’s throw in the wild card—soft skills.

Soft skills are the glue that holds teams together. Communication, teamwork, adaptability—the usual suspects. Corporate types love these buzzwords. They’re essential, they’ll tell you.

And they’re right. In theory.

But in a family business, theory hits reality like a brick wall.

Take communication. It’s vital, right? Say what you mean, listen when others speak. Simple.

Except when “listening” means hearing Uncle John’s ‘feedback’ about your new marketing idea. You’ve heard it before. He’s stuck in 1982, but he’s family, so you nod and smile.

And teamwork? Great in principle. But how do you team up with your sister who’s still upset about what you said at Christmas? The silent treatment doesn’t make for great collaboration.

Then there’s leadership. A strong leader inspires others, makes tough calls, keeps the ship steady. Easy when you’re the founder.

But what about when Dad’s the founder, and you’re the heir apparent? Every decision you make comes with a shadow—“What would Dad do?” Or worse, “Why aren’t you doing it Dad’s way?”

Leadership in a family business isn’t just about steering the ship. It’s about navigating the family’s emotional waters without hitting an iceberg.

And let’s talk about emotional intelligence. It sounds great. Know your feelings, understand others’ feelings. Fine.

Until those feelings are jealousy, resentment, or guilt.

Emotional intelligence in a family business is less about recognising emotions and more about surviving them. It’s not just knowing that Aunt Susan feels overlooked. It’s about dealing with the fallout when she tells the entire family over Sunday lunch.

Here’s the thing: soft skills are critical in family businesses. They can be the difference between chaos and order.

But they’re not plug-and-play. They need recalibrating.

Communication isn’t just talking and listening. It’s managing the minefield of family dynamics.

Teamwork isn’t just collaboration. It’s balancing grudges and alliances.

And leadership? It’s not just inspiring others. It’s carrying the weight of family history while forging a future.

So, what’s the secret?

Start with honesty. Not the brutal kind, but the constructive kind. Recognise the battles, don’t pretend they don’t exist.

Set boundaries. Business decisions stay in the office, family arguments stay at home. Simple, but not easy.

And finally, remember this: no family business runs like clockwork. The key is keeping the cogs turning, even when the battlefield rages on.

Soft skills aren’t a fix-all. But used wisely, they’re the best weapon you’ve got.