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Did you know Gary was once arrested for fornicating with a Cow?

By Stephen On February 1, 2009 Under Internet Marketing

Yes it’s true, at least by an account from the man himself, you can find the reference here. It’s a great story about the life changing experience of a young military policemen long ago stationed in Germany with the US forces.

At the time Gary had no idea that he would one day become one of the most well-known copywriters of the twentieth century. Have you caught on yet about whom I am writing?

If you haven’t heard of Gary Halbert then, were he still alive, he might ask you where you’ve been for the past thirty years. If you have heard of him and then use his methods to peddle c**p he would undoubtedly refer to you as a ’sh*tweasel’.

My friend Gary Simpson, who I’ve never met in person but who engages his readers, including me, so completely that I cannot think of him other than as a friend, and a good one, thinks Gary Halbert became embittered in the last years of his life and overused the term ’sh*tweasel’.

I don’t know about that, what I do know is that had Gary Halbert been alive today and seen what Gary Simpson has accomplished in the few short months he has been writing his blog ‘Internet Marketing Temple of Learning for Newbies‘ he would have been amazed.

Gary Simpson has created a ‘Mecca’ for newbies on-line and through sheer dedication amassed a huge following. What I enjoy about both of these Garys is that they never attempt to sell you anything directly instead they provide interests, information, and amusement orchestrated via their unique personalities.

I sometimes tease Gary Simpson because of all the photographs he has of himself wearing a ‘Gi‘ ~ canvass pajamas to you and me ;-) But when you take the trouble to visit his website you’ll also see him in a DJ and several other kinds of wear.

The mark of a Master is someone who is comfortable across a range of contexts. Gary Simpson is too modest to say as much and, even though I regard Gary as a friend, I also remove my shoes and bow my head before visiting his website.

Gary Halbert had great respect for many other copywriters because he knew just how much research and work goes into writing good copy. Of all the copywriters Gary admired his favourite and closest rival and contemporary is Gary Bengivenga. Gary has a very simple website called BencivengaBullets.com/ and the good news is that you can go there, right now if you like, and Gary will send you simple copywriting tips via e-mail for free.

To my knowledge Gary Bengivenga has no predilections for animal livestock but is someone to whom you should take notice. He’s so busy that you can’t hire him. He threatens to retire, even though those in the know refer to him as ‘the best copywriter in America’.

Gary Begivenga holds that: "In writing sales copy, the use of superlatives is discouraged. They’re empty and meaningless.The only instance where they’re permitted is when you have the evidence to back them up."

How refreshing, and so unlike the way in which most market on the Internet today.

PostScript: Gary Halbert was wrongly accused of sodomizing that cow. The true culprit was eventually apprehended. Nevertheless the experience changed Gary’s life because it enabled him to recognize that your life can change in an instant, and through no fault of your own. The motto of the story: Ad praesens ova cras pullis sunt meliora ;-)

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5 comments - add yours
Gary Simpson

February 1, 2009

My goodness Steve! What can I say?

Well, I was gonna say, “Holey cow!” But then, given the headline and the connotations I refrained. But can you see how sneaky I am? I managed to say it anyway.

Gee mate. That is a BIG call. A BIG call indeed.

I really feel as though making such comparisons is extremely premature. But I thank you in any case. It is quite an honour even to be mentioned and thought of in this manner. I don’t really know what to say.

Um, thinking, thinking, thinking… oh yeah. Now I do. LOL!

I’m gonna say that I will end up disappointing people coz I will stuff up. There is nothing surer. I’m just a normal bloke who, through a lot of dedication and a damn LOT of hard work, has achieved some pretty cool things.

What people see is the culmination of a lot of years in the wilderness, in obscurity and in personal turmoil. And they look at me today and may think, “Wow! This guy has talent.” But then I view others in the same manner. I see Linda Caroll like that. I think, “Gee, wouldn’t it be fabulous to know what Linda does and to be able to write code like a machine.” And then I look at her struggle and her journey and I know how she has come through many, many difficult years.

People, including me, only see the end result. It reminds me of the story of the maestro violinist. Let me tell you…

An enthralled audience was watching the master violinist on stage. He gave a breath-taking virtuoso performance playing piece after piece flawlessy and apparently effortlessly, pizzicato - the lot. He just made it look so easy that even a child could do it. After he finished everyone rose to their feet as one and clapped and cheered for more.

On his way off-stage, a man came running up to him and said, “Maestro, you were wonderful. I’d give my life to be able to play like that!” he waited eagerly for the reply. And the maestro looked the man in the eyes, paused for a moment, and said, “Sir, I did.”

Stephen, I’m still not entirely comfortable with a lot of things. I have a way to go yet. And like I said, I’ll surely bugger something up along the way. And if and when I do make an error of judgement I just hope that I won’t disappoint people too badly.

Thank you very much Stephen. I appreciate what you wrote there. I really do.

Regards

Gary

PS: Email me mate. I have something interesting for you to consider - completely obligation free, of course.

Stephen Bray

February 1, 2009

Gary,

It was a pleasure to write this article, and I’m delighted that you’re the first to reply here.

It’s interesting that you’re talking about buggering everything up, if you will excuse the expression given the post headline ;-)

Have you forgotten the 80/20 rule? Remember even the Buddha spent years in the wilderness before being able to lead others to enlightenment.

The fact that you are able to write so well from the heart today is almost certainly due to all your life experience, possibly even those events that you would prefer to forget.

I am going to blast an e-mail over to you today.

Every good wish,

Stephen

The Players With Money Excercise!

February 15, 2009

[...] Did you know Gary was once arrested for fornicating with a Cow? I don’t know about that, what I do know is that had Gary Halbert been alive today and seen what Gary Simpson has accomplished in the few short months he has been writing his blog ‘Internet Marketing Temple of Learning for Newbies‘ he would have been amazed. [...]

Linda

February 20, 2009

An enthralled audience was watching the master violinist on stage. He gave a breath-taking virtuoso performance playing piece after piece flawlessy and apparently effortlessly, pizzicato - the lot. He just made it look so easy that even a child could do it. After he finished everyone rose to their feet as one and clapped and cheered for more. On his way off-stage, a man came running up to him and said, “Maestro, you were wonderful. I’d give my life to be able to play like that!” he waited eagerly for the reply. And the maestro looked the man in the eyes, paused for a moment, and said, “Sir, I did.”

Great story. Stress and strife are (nothing but) the abrasives that the universe uses to polish human gems with.

Stephen Bray

February 20, 2009

Hi Linda,

That is a good story, and one that Gary sometimes told. He didn’t tell it in my post though did he ;-)

Congratulations for running the gauntlet of my SPAM protection and getting approved as a poster here by me.

How is the Gazz Man?

Send him a kiss from me when you next see him.

And thanks for becoming a member of my on-line beach party at these pages.

Stephen